I feel bad that I haven't written anything in awhile. I think, like so many others, once I become pregnant I don't want to write or talk about it because I'm afraid I'll jinx something. So I remain quiet and try to get through each day and week until my next appointment. But....I thought since it's been a couple weeks I should say hello!
I call this my non-update because I really don't have much new to report. I have my first OB appointment on Monday. And this will be with a new OB, since I've kicked my old one to the curb. The RE I met with last time had said even though I've had 3 losses, they have been early and wouldn't necessarily qualify me for needing to see a high risk OB. However, when I went to make the appointment, the receptionist thought that, for that reason as well as the fact that I'm pregnant with twins, I should see a MFM and scheduled me with one anyway. These are all within the same facility, and this girl normally works in OB but had been filling in at the RE's side that day, so I trusted she knew what she was doing. Getting an appointment with a MFM without having to jump through any hurdles? I'll take it! She said he also sees regular OB patients too, so it shouldn't be an issue. Don't most people with twins see a MFM at some point anyway?
So yeah, I have no idea what to expect at this appointment. I have an initial appointment at 8:00 with the nurse to go over my history, and then with the actual doctor at 9:00. I don't want to tell them how to do their jobs, but I really want to tell the nurse to check for heartbeats first thing, otherwise there's no point in sitting through a 2-hour long appointment if there's no reason to. Surely they won't let me leave without confirming heartbeats are still present, right? And...will they be able to find them with a dopplar at 11 weeks, or will I need another u/s? Like I said, I have no idea what to expect and the unknown scares me a little. Oh, and I'm going to this appointment alone. Ballsy of me? Probably. But it's getting hard for Jeff to miss so much work for these appointments, and I really want to put on my big girl pants and be able to handle whatever news comes my way by myself.
But, I'm hopeful that there will be a reason to stick around for a long appointment.
I still feel like all my symptoms are hanging around. I didn't want to take the time to find a symptom check-in template, so here's my makeshift one:
One of my first pregnancy symptoms has always been extreme thirst, and that hasn't faded with time like it has all the other times before. I still wake up in the morning, or middle of the night, with extreme cotton mouth. I have to guzzle water all day like it's going out of style, and it still doesn't feel like I get enough.
I'm still making regular visits to the bathroom to pee during the day, and waking in the middle of the night to go too. Again, getting up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom never acoompanied my other pregnancies, so I feel like this is definitely a step in the right direction.
The nausea seems to still be hanging around. It's never been horrible, and never all day, but I do still experience it occasionally. It seems like it disappears on the weekends, and reappears during weekdays. I'm sure this can be attributed to the fact that I get to sleep way more on the weekends, and don't do much. Needless to say, weekends have been the worst emotionally for me, because when I'm feeling good, I worry.
Fatigue is definitely something that's hit me hard (and again, never really had this with the other pregnancies). I take a nap almost every day after work, and still have no problems sleeping at night. Most days I feel like I could collapse on my desk and take a nap as well.
They're still big! I can't say they have really been too sore, but they have definitely grown. One thing I remember from the other 3 times, is my boobs would always "deflate" prior to us finding out the bad news. It always worried me, but at the time I tried to tell myself that it was normal. So thankfully this time they're still spilling out over my bra, which is very reassuring.
Still haven't seen this :( But, from what I've read that's okay. Even with twins it doesn't sound like most people have a prominant bump at 10 weeks anyway. I definitely have a pouch, which gets bigger and smaller as the bloat comes and goes. But nothing definite yet. It's so hard to believe everything is okay when you can't physically see a sign of it yet. But I keep reminding myself that this is normal, and there's plenty of time for me to turn into a house over the next 30 weeks or so :)
So, that's all I know for now. I'll update you as soon as I can after my appointment Monday. Please pray I get good news.