Friday, March 23, 2012

One More Thing

One more thing I forgot to put in yesterday's post (which is weird because it's the thing that most upsets me).  I also asked Dr. C if the tissue after every D&C was tested for chromosome issues.  She said it was not.  It was just looking for anything abnormal.  But, you know, if this happens again that can certainly be something we can get done if we'd like.


You mean this could have, and should have, been offered to us after every loss and it wasn't?!  I can understand maybe not having it done the first time, but it for sure should have been done after that.  Regardless, we should have been given that right to decide.

This was towards the end of my appointment (you know, when I was on the verge of tears and just wanted to get the heck out of there) so I just let it go.  Not much I could do at that point anyway.

I went ahead and made the RE appointment (April 5th).  When I called my ob/gyn's office today to have them forward my records, here's how the conversation went:

Office:  Did Dr. C refer you there?
Me:  No.
Office: you didn't talk to her about this then?
Me.  I brought it up to her yesterday, but she didn't seem receptive to the idea, so I just made the appintment myself.

Are you freaking kidding me?  Stop acting like your office can dictate who goes where to see which doctor.  If I want to seek out another opinion elsewhere, that is my right as a patient.  You cannot tell me where I can and can't go.  Both Jeff and my dad made the comment last night that maybe I should just seek out a new ob/gyn regardless.  I'm starting to think maybe they are right.  The last two days with this office has left a really bad taste in my mouth.

Please God, let me get better service and care than this with the RE.  If I'm told at our first appointment that I'm making a much bigger deal out of this than I need to, I don't know what I'll do.....

Thank you all so much for your supportive comments.  Just when I start to think I"m going bat sh!t crazy, your words remind me that I'm not.  It reminds me this is a big deal that should be taken seriously. 


  1. I agree - "Are you kidding me?"

    Sometimes I hate doctors so much. I'm glad you are being proactive!

    ICLW #43

  2. I 100% agree that you should see a new OBGYN. An RE is not just about getting you pregnant! They will look for the issues into why you aren't staying pregnant. I'm angry for you!

  3. I am becoming crazy commenter lady.
    Sorry about that.
    As I said, leave that lady in the dust.

    make sure that your insurance covers your new RE (or at least as much as sweet insurance covers infertility crap) because often your insurance won't cover if you don't have another doctor's referral. Just check. I've been screwed too many times (and I'm still not pregnant. Ha.)

    And, I'm shocked that they didn't have the tissues tested. My RE made sure that Nugget was tested, and that was just my second stilbirth/miscarriage.

    It will get better.
    I don't know when.
    But it will.
    And we'll all be here reading and cyber-stalking you every step of the way.

  4. You have the right to be concerned about your reproductive health and why things are not connecting properly to produce a take home baby. I know I'd be demanding answers and I have when each IVF has failed.

  5. I would find a new OB after your time with the RE. You shouldn't have to feel crappy about wanting to find answers.

    My insurance paid for certain things at the RE and absolutely nothing on others, so you just have to be prepared to pay out of pocket for a lot of it. It sucks that infertility treatment is seen on the same level to insurance companies as cosmetic surgery.

    Glad you found someone else to see.

  6. Oh man, Jenny. I'm sorry your Dr is being stupid. I'm glad you made an appt with an RE (but yes, check w/ your insurance!). I've been amazed at my RE's responsiveness to things... even when I'm there for an appointment, I never have to wait in the exam room more than 5 minutes.

    I can't believe she didn't have any of the tissues tested. You have been trough so much and deserve much better care. Many continued prayers.

  7. Here from ICLW. Ugh. Sounds like it is time to move on. Sorry you are having this crappy time with your doctor. It is hard enough to go through all these fertility problems; we don't need our doctors making us feel worse. I know it must be hard to think about moving on from a doctor you have a relationship with, and previously a good one, but I am glad you are advocating for yourself and what you need to do for your future. It is about you and your health and body and making a healthy, full term baby. I wish you much luck on your journey and I am hoping that you find a great RE to assist you.

  8. Stopping by from ICLW. First off, I just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your losses. No woman should ever have to endure that. Wishing you the best at your appt with the new RE. Sounds like it's definitely time to move on. The fact that the person on the phone questioned you when you asked for your records is out of line, IMO. You said have every right to seek an opinion from a different Dr/Clinic. Best of luck...

    ICLW #77

  9. I think it's great that you are getting in with an RE. They really do more than a regular OB/GYN. So sorry to hear about your most recent loss.

    ICLW #47

  10. Hi, I'm here for ICLW and that is almost exactly what happened to me! I had three miscarriages and on the third one I collected the tissue (I didn't have a D&C) and requested that it be tested. A year later I found out they only looked for abnormalities and didn't actually do a chromosomal test. Idiots. I'm sorry for your losses - good luck figuring out what your next steps will be!

  11. I would be so hopping mad!!!! I hope your RE is better!

  12. it is a HUGE deal and your dr should understand that! good luck with the new RE!!!! :-)

  13. Here from ICLW. Switching to an RE made all the difference in the world! I wish I could stay with my RE once I do get pregnant!!!

  14. i'm SO sorry for the way you were treated! Grrr. it makes me angry for you!
    i am going to be thinking good thoughts for you and your upcoming appointment!
    there's nothing wrong at all with a second opinion.
    and i pray that you get the answers and treament you deserve.
    sending lots of love <3
    hope your weekend is a good one!